This isn’t really about learning how to dance the pole. I mean, it is, but it is also so much more than that. We take our bodies for granted sometimes. We grind ourselves into the ground trying to accomplish all the various tasks that we have to get done throughout the day, all of those things that society expects us to do. Our bodies are capable of so much more if we can just allow ourselves the time and patience required to see it for ourselves.
I am quite frankly amazed at what I’ve been able to accomplish in such a short amount of time in learning how to do specific moves on the pole. I honestly though it would take much longer to get to where I am now. I know there is so much more for me to learn, but I am really happy with my progress thus far.
These moves are physically challenging for me. I come out of class with a plethora of new bruises all the time. It has also presented me with new opportunities to face my own fears. While I had no problems climbing to the top of the pole, (I came to term with my fear of heights long ago.) I do struggle with the holds that put me in an upside down position. For some reason I am terrified of falling on my head. I have no idea where this came from, but at this point in my journey I do feel ready to tackle that obstacle. I know I can do it. I just need to do the scary thing and lean into the fear, instead of shying away from its embrace.
While much of what I have accomplished on the pole is quite a visual entertainment, I am learning so much about myself and how I see myself in the world, how I want to see myself in the world. I am also learning that my body and what it can achieve changes on a daily basis. Much like Spoon Theory, which I have talked about before, our capacity levels change constantly. I am having to check in with myself more often to see where I stand in all the various aspects of my life. It’s quite lovely, I have discovered, taking the time to really see how much you’re able to offer them out there versus how much we really need to be offering up to ourselves.
I am constantly learning, constantly evolving, as I move through this life. And honestly I wouldn’t want to have it any other way. We get so stuck in our comfort zones that we fear what we could become, even though deep down that is what we really want. Embracing these pain points isn’t always easy, but I have more often than not found it completely worth it when you come out the other side. It’s freeing. It’s liberating. And that is exactly what I want more of out of this life.
Mad love, Jenna
