Gemini, the first of four mutable air signs, gifts us a breath of fresh air as we slowly transition from the rainy days of spring toward the warmer, summer days of Cancer season. We can’t rush into the next chapter of our lives until we first internalize all that we have gained from the previous one. Otherwise we will continue to make those same mistakes over and over again. The Universe will continue to mirror back to you the exact piece that is missing from the puzzle that is your life. The message will become louder and louder until you finally sacrifice yourself to fact that this is the thing that you are supposed to be paying attention to.
According to Norse mythology, Loki was considered to be the trickster god, the most mischievous god of them all. Never inherently considered to be a protagonist nor an antagonist, Loki was self-serving but also lovable and charming. Loki is chaotic, which the tribunal of gods considers to be a bad trait. They dislike it because it goes against the order they have set in place. This has little to nothing to do with being moral or “good,” because it mostly benefits them. The rune Ansuz reminds us that “even scoundrels and arch-thieves can be bearers of wisdom” (Ralph Blum, The Book of Runes). Although Loki often uses his cunning to help others out of troubling situations, he is frequently the one who got them into it in the first place.
I Am
Magic isn’t all about tricks and deception. It’s also about manifestation, and the desire within us all to take inspired action in our lives. The Magician in tarot is ruled by Mercury, the ruling planet of Gemini and the planet most known as “the great communicator.” Most people only think about Mercury when it’s in retrograde, because that is a time when lines tend to get crossed or even sometimes completely disrupted. We harp on the part about technology mostly because that is our main form of communication these days.
If you take all the major arcana cards in the tarot and remove the Fool, because he is numbered as zero in the deck, you are left with a stack of 21 cards. You can then lay them out into three lines of seven cards each. The Magician is all about finding the alchemy in your own life. He marks the beginning of line one of the tarot, the life line. This line, which runs through the Chariot card, is the one that rules birth, identity, and ego. It’s essentially the caterpillar part of your soul’s evolution, with line two being the cocoon and line three being the butterfly. Line one walks us through some basic questions about what our role in the world is and what we identify as, with the Magician specifically focusing on expressing the truest form of self. Loki flows between the male and female archetype, often transforming his appearance as well, giving us a perfect depiction of this duality of Gemini.
The Magician invites us to discover and embody ourselves fully, which often leads us to consider everything we desired as a child. We used to create through the fire of will, while remaining open and available to this creativity with pushing. I remember making mud pies as a kid, not caring that most of the time I ended up covered, requiring a run through the sprinkler or a quick hose-down in the backyard. The older I became the more serious I became, often missing out on the simple joys of the moment.
Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life’s coming attractions.
Albert Einstein
The Magician reminds us that everything we need in order to succeed in this life are right at our fingertips. It’s a clear sign that you have the tools, the resources, and the energy you need in order to make your dreams come true. What is the one thing that will move you in the direction of your goal? That is your next step. The Magician knows what he wants. He believes in himself enough to make it happen as long as he gives it some effort. That’s the part a lot of people miss about this whole manifestation thing. You can’t just dream on a wish that it will come true. You have to make some conscious effort, to exert your will and your knowledge so that you can then shape the world.
Looking into the Mirror
The Lovers, the tarot card for Gemini Season, is ruled by Venus, the planet of love and beauty. It’s not asking us to search for our long lost soulmate on this planet. It’s asking that we look within at the ways we can learn to love ourselves, the good, the bad, and the ugly. Venus is also the ruling planet of Libra, my sun sign and the sign of balance. Libras have a tendency to turn ourselves into chameleons in our attempts to relate to others. I can absolutely vouch for the truth in this. I have manipulated myself into being all of the things that everyone else wants me to be, while abandoning my true self in the process. It got to the point where I no longer even knew the person who was staring back at me through the mirror. And if we’re being honest, I didn’t really like her very much.
Geminis tend to mirror back to people what they are seeing in order to relate, essentially twinning with them. “When we admire qualities in others, it’s the Universe’s way to get you to wake up and recognize your own strengths – in other words, you need to realize that whatever you perceive in other people you also have within yourself” (Dr. John Demartini). This is the ultimate form of social manifestation. You get to choose how Gemini will come for you. You choose what mood we are in today, so better make it a good one. Misery loves company, but so does joy. A celebration isn’t much of a party if only one person gets invited.
Sometimes the things that get reflected back to us aren’t what I would call pretty. I have an inner critic that can be awfully loud at times, and often disparaging. And once that negative self-talk and those limiting beliefs start protesting in my head, it can be quite the task to get them to shut the fuck up and sit down. I am royally hard on myself. Just ask my therapist! Sometimes is takes a force to be able to quiet the mind, so that I can then begin to question those thoughts. I’ve often referred to this as “reality checking” the messages. Is it true, like really? Our minds love to concoct stories, to spin yarns. They are fucking liars sometimes, and we have to be aware enough to call them out if need be.
The Help
There comes a point in our lives when we begin to receive signals that the skeletons, those things we try to hide away from the world, demand to be seen, to be cleared out of our metaphorical closets. And it is most definitely not a fun task in any sense of the word. It’s fucking hard to face those demons. It’s never comfortable knowing that you were the asshole in a particular situation. What you can do is to learn and do better next time, and maybe forgive yourself just a tiny bit for the harm that you most definitely caused.
It’s rarely a good time digging yourself out of the trenches of your own life. We humans tend to live out of our raw emotions and gut reactions more often than not. Maybe it’s just us Americans? I don’t really know, and I can only speak to what I do know. I had to learn to tame those animal instincts, so that I wouldn’t continue to sever the relationships that I do actually care about maintaining. We have more strength inside of us, more power, than we give ourselves credit for. As cliché as it is, look at how fucking far you’ve come. I’m saying this more as a reminder to myself than anything.
I think a lot of it boils down to focusing on where your true passions lie, the things that light you up. I know all too well that trying to find the bright side of things when you are deep in that hole can sound like a giant load of toxic positivity. I hate, and I don’t use that word lightly, the people who tell you to be grateful for what you do have. It crosses the line for me. It diminishes my trauma. It’s like telling someone after they lose a loved one that they are in a better place now. Anne Lamott once said that “help is the sunny side of control.” It doesn’t fucking help. It only makes you feel more comfortable in my mess, and it makes me feel misunderstood, unseen, and even more alone than ever. Alternatively when you do find yourself at the bottom of the well, be open to asking for the right kind of help, preferably from someone trained to give it.
Mad love, Jenna
